5 Things I Learned Hugging Complete Strangers

Global Free Hugs was started by Juan Mann, whose mission was to brighten people’s lives, or at the very least, their day. I watched his social experiment video a few years ago, and became totally inspired, although I never thought I’d see the day where I would be the one willingly standing out in a public square, soliciting free hugs to complete strangers… but alas, the day has come and (sadly) gone. Here are five things I learned in the process:

1. Foreigners dig hugs. Americans? Not so much.

So, in the process of facilitating this social experiment, we noticed that foreigners were way more apt to receive a free hug over Americans. Is this why I think Europe is so dreamy? Look, I know we (Americans) value our imagined little bubbles, but come on. . . . We were giving away HUGS . . . . for free! On the flip side, we did get a lot of thumbs up for the cause, and some smiles from people who were trying really hard not to smile. For me, that’s enough. So I’ll take it.

2. Our concept of “free” has been completely lost in our commercialized society.

At least half the people we hugged (and some who didn’t want hugs) asked what the catch was: “No really, how many donations are you soliciting?” When we explained that we weren’t taking donations, or that we didn’t represent a company etc. they seemed puzzled and asked, “Then why are you doing this?” More often than not I answered with: “Because everyone needs a hug.” And, in fact, it’s true! Studies have shown that a person who gives and/or receives about 12 hugs per day will lead a healthier, happier, and more fulfilled life. So what are you waiting for? Start hugging!

3. Receiving is awesome, but giving is more awesome.

I’m not gonna lie, I love receiving gifts. It’s actually one of my love languages. However, the joy I got from knowing I’ve directly helped to improve someone else’s life or day is on a totally different (higher) level than the joy I get from knowing someone was thinking about little ol’ me. To give is to receive. You cannot give without receiving joy in return. It’s all-encompassing and I highly encourage this practice! I hugged one guy and he said, “Thank you. I really needed that.” It literally made my entire weekend!

4. Contrary to popular belief, Karma is not a bitch (at least not always).

We gave free hugs away in Santa Monica on 3rd street promenade, and had to park in a nearby structure, which of course, is not free. We did our two hours of free hugs (which went by really, really fast) and when we went to leave and pay for our parking, the ticket spit back out with $0.00 on it. I’m not sure if this was a coincidence, but I’d like to think it was Karma working her ways in our favor. So if that was you, thank you. Free parking in L.A. is like winning the lottery. 

5. The best way to deal with rejection is to subject yourself to it!

I don’t know about you, but I’m absolutely terrified of rejection. So much so, that I will intentionally avoid certain situations in anticipation of this very scary element of life. What I loved about Free Hugs is that it forces you to step outside of your comfort zone and face that rejection head on. I feel way less intimidated by rejection than I’ve ever felt!

CrossFit Anywhere: No Excuses

 

{All photos courtesy of CrossFit.com}

I’m constantly inspired by people who refuse to let physical or geographical obstacles keep them from doing what they truly love. Rain, shine, snow, desert, war, home, missing leg … it doesn’t matter. When you want something bad enough, you will always, always find a way. What’s your excuse?

An Open Letter To My Younger Self

 

Dear Rebecca,

Stop trying to grow up so fast. I know your childhood isn’t ideal, but no matter what, it’s your childhood. Don’t give that time away, because you can never have it back.  Go outside and play more often. Stop trying to impress adults all the time – not all of them are as perfect as you think they are. Demonstrate some courage when another kid pushes you around; they’re not nearly as powerful as you give them credit for. That courage will become the very foundation you build the rest of your life on, and trust me when I say, you won’t trade it for the world.

When you find yourself in circumstances that confuse you, and you will, it’s okay. In fact, it’s all apart of the bigger point. Remember your brain is still developing right now, and you’re not fully capable of understanding all of the answers to your questions, but don’t let that discourage you from asking them anyway. Those questions are single-handedly going to shape and mold who you’re going to become someday. So, ask more! You have plenty of time to connect the dots.

Try to realize that everyone is doing their best from their own point of consciousness. The sooner you truly believe this, the sooner you will have compassion for others. That compassion is going to make the glass appear half-full at times. Of course initially the idea will feel foreign, and at times delusional, but keep at it. The first time you indulge in that perspective will also be the first time you feel happiness in a capacity beyond your comprehension. Enjoy it, and remember it in the greatest of detail - it’s going to give you hope when life seems meaningless.

You are so strong. Would you believe me if I told you that someday you’re going to literally lift the weight equal to three of you? It seems impossible now, but it’s the absolute truth. There’s a fire burning inside of you, and it’s important to not let anyone put it out, or convince you otherwise. In the meantime however, don’t get so down on yourself for your emotional reactions. Crying does not mean you’re weak. It’s a necessary part of your growth. Just learn to listen to yourself, and more importantly, others.

Don’t be afraid of failure. Failure is a sign you’re trying, and you’ll learn more about life (and yourself) from your failures, than from your successes. And during the times you are successful, don’t dumb yourself down for anyone. Be humble about it, but be proud. There’s no shame in patting yourself on the back once in a while, because at the end of the day, the only person’s approval that matters is your own.

Sincerely & With Love,
Rebecca The Red

***

If you could write a letter to your younger self, what would it say?

Swooning Over: New York

My heart aches so badly for New York. I’ve never even lived there or visited for that matter, and yet every time I browse photos of Brooklyn, NYC or Manhattan, a soothing warmth radiates throughout my entire body and soul that I can only describe as what it must feel like to be “home”. Then I think about spending a winter there, and my imaginary plans of moving there are further prolonged.

Ode To Friends: Past, Present & Future

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“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with – Jim Rohn“

 

Merriam-Webster defines a friend as the following:

¹friend

noun \ˈfrend\

Definition of FRIEND

 

1     a  :  one attached to another by affection or esteem

       b  :  acquaintance

2     a  :  one that is not hostile

       b  :  one that is of the same nation, party, or group

3     :  one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)

4     :  a favored companion

 

 

What Merriam-Webster doesn’t tell you about (true) friends is:

 

• These people will sincerely impress you when you’re not looking. No, seriously. If you really give them the chance, you will be amazed at what you find. Trust me.

• They’ll unintentionally challenge you to grow bigger than you thought possible. Their differing viewpoints will challenge you to go beyond your borders.

• They’ll be there when you need it, not when you want it. Because if you want it, you can probably solve it by yourself. But when you need it, they’ll just know.

(…and the list goes on and on and on…)

 

To The Point Please…

I guess what I’m trying to say is that my friends are absolutely incredible creatures; each & every one of them. Even the ones that no longer reside on the path that I’m on… and that’s okay, because even though they’re not present in my life anymore, it doesn’t mean they’re not still present in my heart (with very fond memories). That, coupled with the presence of love in my heart for the friends that do still reside in my life along with the ones that I know are on their way, has enraptured me into such a state of humility, appreciation & bliss that I could quite honestly burst into tears of joy.

They have all contributed (some with blood, sweat, tears & much frustration) to making me into the person I am today and no amount of thank yous will ever scratch the surface of expressing how blessed I feel to share a friendship with them.